Unraveling An Introvert: The INFJ 

All my life I always felt like I stood out from others it is not until later in life when I came to understand myself through my personality type after coming across MBTI. I have to admit reading Carl Jung’s work has been most insightful and informative. I find most of his work so fulfilling and I can understand and relate to his interpretation of the psyche.

Most introverts have the most beautiful and peaceful souls but to others we are viewed as difficult to understand and others fill an introvert’s silence with their own interpretations, either, they’re bored, they’re depressed, they’re shy, they’re arrogant and many others. When others can’t read you they write their own stories contrary to who you are. 

Inside an introverts head:

  1. We dislike small talk and hate gossip, we would rather just be silent than engage in any kind of pleasantries. We enjoy deep conversations, we like to explore topics in depth, talk to us about why you think the universe exists, what is your take on incarnation, what do you think about the soul of the universe, what do you think about Buddhism, what do you think about the northern lights, the stars and the full moon and how do they make you feel?
  2. We don’t like crowds and loud parties, we prefer being at home and in our own space comfortable and not surrounded by people, we enjoy being with nature and in serene environment, gardening, reading, music, theater, writing in our journals, visiting art galleries and museums. People drain us and that is why we embrace silence and solitude, we can spend days on our own without any human contact and not feel lonely for a moment. So we always have to find a balance between the amount of social contact we need to be happy and the amount that makes us stressed and drained out.
  3. Introverts are highly intuitive and soak in information and peoples patterns like a sponge we don’t trust words others speak or actions others do. In a way we are able to feel other people’s energy and we trust the way we feel when we are listening to other people’s words both spoken and unspoken. We pay attention to the silence and spaces in words left hanging and unsaid, we interpret others’ silence and hear everything they don’t say in words. We are aware of body language, tonal variations, and facial expressions. In fact we are not even aware we are paying attention to these things, they just come automatically to us and after a conversation we trust and follow our own intuition.
  4. We are deeply passionate creatures whether it is in a conversation, hobby, career or love. We have an all or nothing mentality, we don’t believe in half efforts. When we decide and put our mind to something we immerse ourselves body, mind and spirit. We believe that everything is a work of art and designed by the universe to serve its purpose. If you are interested to get to know more about an introvert ask us about what we love and are passionate about then give us the space to talk freely, you will be surprised on how we will go on and on as if lost in an abyss.
  5. Introverts are inward and deep thinkers our world exists within and we get our energy and rejuvenate by being alone.  Because of this trait we take time to answer questions, we like to think deeply and from angles before we give a response we view best. If someone asks a question we may take time to respond because we have to go within to find the answer.
  6. From a young age we grow up feeling wiser and knowledgeable on many subject matters than most people and that is one of the reasons we feel like we don’t fit in with others. In fact we end up taking the role of advising and counseling strangers, siblings and friends on matters concerning life from a very young age because firstly we are very good listeners; we empathize with others and feel other people’s emotions as if we are the ones going through them and mostly because we feel we have a grasp on understanding others’ feelings.
  7. Getting information out of an introvert is like trying to get blood out of a stone, we build very high walls around us because we know we are fragile and because of this we protect our (Ni and Fe) but once you get to know us we become more relaxed. In fact you get to see an entirely different person once we start talking; we are imaginative, colorful, mischievous, playful and hearty people. The best bet is to be patient and give us space to open up in our own time.
  8. Conflict and arguments are two things we avoid like the plague, we easily get scared facing conflicts. When we really speak our minds we are brutally honest and this is mostly mistaken for harshness or rudeness but it comes from a well-intentioned place. This doesn’t mean we necessarily run away from conflicts, our personality is peaceful by nature and believe that situations can be resolved without arguments and quarrels.  We just recognize that conflicts give birth to unnecessary harsh language and even actions.
  9. We are not self-expressing, though we have a very clear and organized thought process we tend to have a problem articulating them in a way the message will be delivered and understood exactly as we feel and intend. While expressing ourselves, words may come out clumsily conveyed and disorganized and we do not like disorder in whatever manner. Due to this we prefer to remain silent and collect our thoughts mostly through writing down exactly what we feel because with writing, words are arranged exactly how we need them to be.
  10. We appear to be composed on the outside but we are a bundle of emotions on the inside. It is very noticeable when something is bothering us, but that doesn’t mean we will want to talk about it. We tend to push people away and throwing a pity party though we would like someone to confide in but more often than not we feel that most people don’t understand us. Sometimes we are just as confused about our moods as others are, we only need time alone to meditate and figure out why we feel moody. Though we would feel better expressing our feelings and concerns we need someone who is very patient and understanding. The fact that we don’t talk is not because we consider ourselves too good to talk to others. It is because we don’t know how and/or we need time to get to know you.
  11. Meditation is an introvert’s companion. Personally I discovered meditation through a spiritual niche. Being catholic reciting the Rosary gave me a certain calm and inner peace which improved my overall mood. So even when I am not reciting the Rosary I take time to just meditate and breathe listening to my heartbeat or reciting the serenity prayer over and over.
  12. We are very organized in our comfort zone; anything outside that comfort zone can cause us to go into an instant panic. We place great importance on having things orderly and systematic in our outer world. We put a lot of energy into identifying the best system for getting things done, constantly defining and re-defining the priorities in our lives. Therefore when we find ourselves outside our comfort zone we feel lost and confused and this can lead to making a mess of things, temporary depression and a lot of mistakes because we are unable to find a system to follow. 

Introverts are very interesting people if you’re interested to get to know them. We might look like difficult people but on the contrary we are the easiest people. We don’t like people trying to tell us how to live our lives because we believe to be more self-aware than most people. We tend to be a bit of perfectionists, but personally I try to be flexible with others as much as I can. We always feel like we are not utilizing our fullest potential as a result we feel we should be doing more; inspiring others and mostly learning ways to improve our self-growth every day. We actually gauge ourselves at the end of given periods, how much we have actually grown and the progress we have made in our lives be it career wise or personal growth. We hate attention and we believe in earned credit, we don’t like advertising our achievements. We prefer working in the shadows where we can be truly ourselves. We actually struggle with internet forums and social media; we are overwhelmed by trying to control how much of us we let others see. 



October 24, 2017 at 12:05 pm

I loved the way you put this together. I feel so identified!

October 25, 2017 at 8:48 am

Thank you so much, am glad that you can relate to the post:))

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

True Religious Freedom

August 31, 2017

The Kenya Odyessy

October 17, 2017